 The
place we were staying situated about
5 minutes from my colleague's house in the Malay village. It's a simple semi-D type of house that's
turned into a Motel for visitors to stay. It's small but since we were going to spend most of our time
out at my colleague's there's nothing to complain about. The tiny driveway in the village is very simple,
though tared but you can see that trees are still everywhere. You can see chicken, lambs and sheep, not to
mention cows everywhere and you will just have this peaceful feeling that you just can't help being laid
back like the rest of the villages - except they started to be really curious when me and my colleague
snapping photos all the way… thinking what sort of geeks are we who just wouldn't put our lenses down.
We even manage to take some pretty neat photos of a pregnant cat that just came over and purred around us,
as curious as the villages wondering where we came from.
The first night of the traditional wedding ceremony was Akad Nikah
(Traditional Malay
Wedding Solemnisation), it is the main wedding registration ceremony where the bridegroom will come over
to the brides' house with gifts, including dowry, and to meet with the religious leader. The process was
pretty long where the religious leader will preach to the groom about the Islam laws of marriage, with
the bride's family, friends and relatives sitting around witnessing this event. The groom later must reside
out loud the wedding oath in front of the religious leader and everyone else before he can meet the bride.
After the "stressful" ceremony (for the groom as he will be nervous all the way) everyone will have a simple
dinner together and part their ways home. The groom has to return home without the bride as well because the
whole ceremony isn't finished although they are legally married by law and by religion wise. The bride's
family will need to clean up and get reading for the next day's wedding ceremony.
Before the ceremony
began we manage to meet up with the bride's best friend from Japan where
they flew over to witness her wedding. They also came with some traditional green tea and we all managed to
taste the rich and creamy tea made by Jun-chan the traditional way. She asked us to have the sweet she
brought from Japan first so that we will not taste the tea too bitterly, in case we couldn't stand it.
According to Jun-chan a cup of this traditional green tea consist of the nutrients equivalent as 1/4 of a
cabbage. So it's very good to have it everyday. There are steps to enjoy the tea and we have learned as much
as they have learned how we enjoy our tea here, with sugar added in. After this meeting I will hope to visit
them in Japan and get to see how their wedding is performed.
Day 2 was the Bersanding (Wedding reception) ceremony where a great feast will
be held at the bride's house. Relatives and neighbours will come over (since the night before) to help to
prepare the feast, from curry chicken, beef rendang, to simple cucumber prickled salad. The bride will get
ready gifts and waits for the groom to arrive later but for my colleague's case her husband came earlier for
bridal photo shooting. In Islam rule that both man and woman can't just simply have intimacy until they are
married so the wedding photos are usually taken after Akad Nikah. It was a different feeling where the studio
is set at the bride's home with the Bersanding stage. It was raining in the morning when we arrived to witness
the photo shooting, but God is good as the rain wasn't very heavy and stopped two hours before the actual
Bersanding ceremony begins.
After photo shooting the groom returned to his home where they have prayers and he
returned to the bride's home with his "convoys", from relatives and friends, where the brides family
welcome the groom and presented the bride's gifts in return. The newly weds then proceed to the stage
where they were seated and family and friends can come and see them and give their well wishes. The entire
ceremony can proceed until nightfall as there will continue to have visitors coming to congratulate the couple
with a feast awaits them.
Again the groom will return to his home without his bride until the third day of the ceremony,
where most city Malay wedding ceremonies only ended at Bersanding.
Day 3 - Before the continuation of the wedding celebration the newly weds were kind enough to
take us around to see the beautiful city of Kota Bharu. It isn't really big but it is peaceful as it was a
Saturday (holiday) for the state. We went to the all-famous
White House
coffee shop, where all the Kelantanese in Kota Bahru knows and loves to hang out. It's been there for a long time and the food
there remains as delicious as ever, with its famous Roti Bakar (Toast) and smooth Kaya.
We even manage to visit the
famous Pasar Kathijah, where it was said that the place once only inhibited with women traders and sellers and men
were not to sell there. Till now, we still see many women sells at the vegetable stores inside but outside the building you can
see men selling fruits as usual, except occationally you see some men looking after the stall at upper levels.
The place is quite huge with 3 levels high and you can see all sorts of vegetables, poultry, fish, spices and even batik clothes sold in this area.
The Jemputan Menantu (welcoming the daughter-in-law) is celebrated were the bride and her convoy will go to
the bride's home with some gifts, and the groom awaits her with another banquet from the groom's family. The women from the
bride's side, from families, friends and relatives will bring the gifts into the house as they visit the newly wed's room,
while the men stayed outside and have their lunch, another great feast with all sorts of delicious Kelantan food and deserts. It's a simple process and then the bride's family bid farewell as the newly
weds sent them off.
We managed to stay back at the groom's house for a few hours as my colleague was helping them to take more
wedding photos. We even manage to see the paddy fields were more photos were taken. Their golden outfit fitted perfectly well
with the fields of yellow-green and mud where the harvest was in the process.
It was a good take as we were blessed with yet
another clear sky before we parted to our Motel to rest and get ready to fly home the next morning.
Overall it was a fruitful trip to experience traditional Malay village wedding, though we didn't
manage to visit a lot in the city neither we went to the borders of Thailand for shopping; but the exposure with
friendly folks in the village and an excellent place to retreat away from the chaos of the big cities welcomes
another visit to this side of the country, and who knows, perhaps this time we'll get to see the beach and shop
till we drop.
Note:
PS: There is a cultural shock though. Kelantanese does not use toilet paper; they use water to clean up after going to the loo. If you are not used to it please remember to bring tissue papers everywhere you go.
PPS: Another thing is the Kelantan food is pro to sweet stuffs, therefore it is pretty challenging if you do not have a sweet tooth.
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It was hard to stay awake as I wasn't
sleeping for the last 3 days and I practically knocked out during the 55 minutes
flight, and my colleague, who couldn't sleep though over exhausted, still manage
to snap some cloudy skies and some land when it is reaching the Kelantan state.
I manage to wake up on time to view the really long and wide Kelantan River; only
to know that it is so milky with mud it looks like milk tea. Never the less it was
a thrill as I watched the plane decreased its altitude and landed smoothly at the
local airport.
